Facing an unprecedented parking crisis, dozens of students have been camping out overnight to secure their parking spots for the following day.
The Troll interviewed one of these students, a Senior who explained the benefits of residing in the CHS parking lot. “I haven’t left the school since last Saturday,” she remarked. “I don’t have to pay rent anymore, I can access reliable internet, and there’s no need to worry about a commute.”
Other students are also adopting the “camping warrior” lifestyle. A junior told the Troll that he gives out free bowls of soup. The campers have developed a flourishing local community that has a wide reach, extending all the way to the boundaries of Warrior Way. However, many students still stubbornly oppose the lifestyle of the campers.
To alleviate the parking situation, some students have proposed replacing the football stadium with another parking lot. As a sophomore remarked, “We would win just as many games while having less noise and light pollution.” One CHS booster club member opposes this plan. “Irresponsibly increasing the number of parking spots will decrease demand, driving the value of our parking passes down and shrinking school funding.” Unlike these one-sided solutions, BVSD has recently created a plan that will support the camping community instead of dismissing them.
Administration has decided to remodel the COVID portion of the parking lot as a district-sanctioned ‘Camper Zone’. It will be supplied with various items including complimentary toothbrushes, cans of soup, pillows, and enough deodorant to mask the smell of the entire high school. To conserve space, this area will forgo excessively large parking spots for space-conscious tent spaces. This will allow students to establish a permanent residence instead of worrying about limited parking. The district is confident that permitting camping in certain areas will solve the parking problem at CHS.
Students and Faculty unanimously praised the move. Language arts teacher Mr. Hensley described the policy as a “unique solution that addresses the root causes of the hardships faced by these warriors.” He continued, “allowing students to use the parking lot in this revolutionary way will create a close-knit community, decrease carbon emissions, and make camping a safer and more convenient option for CHS students”.
The Camper Zone is projected to grow at an impressive rate. Even students who, prior to the district’s announcement, assumed that developing new parking spots was the only way to address the issue felt satisfied with the outcome. One junior stated, “After witnessing both the compassion of the administration and our issue of parking first-hand, I’m considering joining the encampment.”
The days of traditional parking may soon be behind us. One excited teacher envisions a world where all students can “sleep under the stars, embrace nature, and be part of a larger community.” He told me, “Who knows? Maybe removing parking spaces, not building more, will be the cure to the parking epidemic facing Centaurus.” Judging by the current policies, CHS admin clearly agrees.
A map of the new parking lot is available at ceh.bvsd.org/announcements/centaurus-parking-lot-revision
